Chapter Four: Anger unleashed

Unable to separate herself from the sleeping bear, Veronica reluctantly stayed the whole night. She barely got any sleep however, most of her night was spent regretting not being home with her children and mentally trying to block out the loud snoring. The sun had began to rise and Veronica managed to pull away successfully.

The cold air surrounding the house hit her body hard. She shivered and quickly made her way to the dresser in front of the bed. She was sure her "friend" wouldn't mind if she borrowed a shirt. But honestly, she didn't really care. She slipped on a shirt that was a dozen sizes too big and barely covered her chest, but it would do she decided. 

She glanced over her shoulders to make sure he was still sleeping. Yes, she mentally checked off in her head. Veronica crept out the bedroom as silently as possible, even though she was sure an earthquake wouldn't wake him up.

Veronica had finally stumbled into the bathroom in no time. It wasn't really hard to find places in such a tiny house like this. She sighed in relief when she noticed the bathroom was mirror less. She didn't need to see the smeared makeup and heavy eye bags for the millionth time. You could swear she was tired of it, but apparently not tired enough. She groaned as she replayed last night. Why did she even leave her home? and worse, why did she come here? She thought.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the bathroom door swinging open. Foot prints were followed and she could see who had joined her from the reflection in the window. 

A body was pressed against hers and arms made their way around her waist. Veronica resist the urge to shudder and run. 

"Morning." He greeted. Veronica returned his greeting with a false sense of happiness. It was easily believed. She soon untangled herself and told her companion that she had to get home to her kids. 

He offered to ride back with her, but she turned down his offer. He seemed a bit hurt, but didn't push the topic further. Before she walked out of the door, he slipped a few bucks into her hand. She was taken back at first. She had never received money after a one night stand, as if she was a prostitute. But Veronica assumed that's what he thought. She mumbled a thank you and hailed down a cab. 

The Taxi stopped in front of her apartment building, she paid her fare and walked inside. As she pushed the corresponding button for her floor, she prayed her kids were gone or sleep. She didn't need to see the disappointment in their faces too. 

She stepped into the apartment and was heading to the bathroom when she heard the refrigerator door shut. She knew it was Jeremy so she went to greet him. 

"Jeremy what are you doing up so early?" She asked. She noted that he was dressed too, he must have been leaving for school. 

"What's it to you?" He snapped at her when he turned to face her. 

"Wha--t?" She sputtered out. Jeremy and her rarely talked these days, but he never flat out took such a tone with her. 

"Why do you care?" He repeated. "You're just coming in yourself!" He said and gestured over her. 

Veronica was about to apologize, when he cut her off. The look on his face said enough, but it didn't stop him from expressing his anger verbally. 

"What kind of mother does that, stays out all night without worrying if her children even made it home ok?" He yelled. "

"While you were out whoring yourself around do you know what I was doing? I had to make sure Malcolm was taken care of all while doing my homework and getting what little sleep I could before work!" He went on. Her behavior wasn't anything new, but he had hoped she'd change once school opened back up. But no, she disappointed him yet again. He really should be used to it by now, but everyday he woke up thinking, hoping she'll change. Hoping she'll be the mom he used to know. 

Veronica took the verbal abuse in silence. She deserved to hear this even though each word was like a knife in her heart. She blinked backed tears and continued to listen. 

"I just fucking hate you. You have no sense of responsibility and could care less what happens to me or Malcolm. I just wish you'd drop dead already, because then I would't have to worry anymore. I would know you're never coming home and wouldn't spend half of the night tossing and turning or consoling Malcolm when he can't sleep!" He finished. His voice had began to crack, he was shaking and turned a a slight shade of red. He exhaled in one big huff before finally pushing past her. He yelled out that she could at least watch Malcolm while he went to school before slamming the door behind him. 

Veronica stood there unable to move until she heard a cry from the nursery. She wiped her own tears before making her way to Malcolm. He was standing to be picked up. 

"Shh" Veronica soothed and reached down to scoop him up. 

"It's okay." She said and he soon grew quiet. 

She bounced him up and down until a smile shot on his face. She smiled as well and for a moment she didn't feel guilty. She didn't feel like the worse mother in the world. 

"You still love me huh?" She asked Malcolm softly. The toddler just laid his head on her shoulder in response. 

Yeah, you love me because you don't know the monster I am yet. She thought.